the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
