Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize