Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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