Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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