Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Cover your peen. We're going out.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
