I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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