I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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