The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
27 Drunk People That Pissed Off The Cops And Got What They Deserved
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway