FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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