Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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