did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize