I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
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