So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize