I seem to have left my pride at pride
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
