Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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