i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Mom said you looked used
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Randomize
