so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
