I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
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she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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