guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
