its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
