Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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