i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
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