You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Randomize