ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
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I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
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I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
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