can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
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