dude i'm inner monologue high
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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