honey bunches of taint.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I could fuck to npr.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Randomize
