Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize