If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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