I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize