I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
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I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
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he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
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