Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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