Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
