Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
