i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Randomize
