The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
