Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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