I smell stomach acid.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
splinters make it hard to masturbate
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
