How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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