when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
