where am i from again
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Randomize
