You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
