1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
