you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize