I want to make a zoo with you.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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