OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
