apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
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