Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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