I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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