Only a mothe r could love this liver
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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