I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
